Bluebird Read online

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

  Bluebird

  A Novel

  Written by Stella James

  Copyright © 2017 Stella James

  All rights reserved

  No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons living or dead, events or locations are entirely coincidental.

  The towns, cities and counties mentioned in this book are intended to be fictional and were created by the author. Any resemblance to an actual place is entirely coincidental.

  Cover design by Stella James

  Formatted for kindle and paperback by Stella James

  18+ Due to content. This book contains elements of a sexual nature that may serve as a trigger for some. Discretion strongly advised.

  ISBN – 978-0-9958388-7-1

  Bluebird

  A novel

  By Stella James

  For Logan and Prairie

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  An excerpt from Worth the Wait

  Prologue

  The gravel crunches beneath my black boots that are nearly a size too small, the cool morning breeze keeping me awake as I walk along the side of the dirt road with the idea that I’m better than where I come from. That I’m going to be someone. The trailer park is fading behind me and the further away I get, the more I can convince myself that I’m walking towards a step that will get me the hell out of this shit life and onto something better. Something to be proud of.

  I’ve been walking past the same dead field full of junk and old car parts every day for the last week on my way to work. Large burn barrels full of garbage that the ravens have already begun to feast on, line up in a row along the rusted barbed wire fence. I look to the same spot each time I walk by and hold my breath until I see it. A flash of blue feathers, perched on top of a rotting wooden fence post. A bluebird, sitting perfectly still, surrounded by piles of forgotten trash.

  Prairie Bennett is like that bird. A beautiful creature surrounded by ugly things. A splash of colour trapped in a cage made of cheap tin boxes lined up one after another in our sad little trailer park. She’s strong and proud and one of the few people in the entire world who has ever looked at me like I’m worth something. I’m pretty sure that I’ve loved her since that day in the cafeteria when her hand reached for mine…

  I fall to the cold, hard ground and wipe the blood from my lip before scrambling back up and smashing my fist into the other guy’s face. The crunch of cartilage and the snapping of bones is music to my ears. I don’t know who this bastard is, and it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I win. The pot for tonight is well over three grand and fifty percent of it is mine. The crowd surrounding the makeshift cage cheers so loud that I can feel the vibration of their demand for more right down to my bones. More. They always want more. My opponent falls to the blood-stained ground and the crowd counts back from ten.

  As the bellowing crowd reaches one, an eruption of cheers echo around me. I swipe my shirt up off the ground and pull it over my head. I walk through the mass of people who chant my name and past the women who offer up their bodies for my own personal entertainment, like I’m some kind of hero. I collect a stack of dirty bills from Nico the bookkeeper on my way out the door. I don’t turn around, I don’t look back. I leave the dingy warehouse and begin the five block walk back to my empty apartment. I always walk after a fight, as long as I’m able to. I need the fresh air in my lungs. I need to breathe.

  The darkness envelops me as I keep my head down and walk across the gravel parking lot. My memories are haunting me more clearly tonight than they ever have. I could have sworn I saw her face in the crowd.

  Prairie.

  My bluebird.

  Part One

  Our Past

  Chapter 1

  Prairie

  “Prairie, we’re gonna be late!”

  “Just a minute!” I call back.

  I turn my gaze back to the mirror in front of me and tug gently on the hem of my purple hoodie, willing it to stretch just another inch longer. I can’t remember the last time I wore something that didn’t come from the church’s goodwill bin. Not that I’m a snob, but today is the first day of my senior year and for just a minute, in the privacy of my bedroom, I’m allowing myself to be disappointed that I don’t have anything brand new to wear. I look down at my dark blue skinny jeans and my faded black flats. At least the jeans fit properly.

  “Prairie?” My mom knocks lightly on the door and peeks her head in. “Honey, we have to get a move on,” she says, stepping through the doorway. She stands beside me and wraps her arm around my shoulders as I let out a sigh.

  “Does this look okay, Mama?”

  She tilts my chin up and forces me look in the mirror in front of us. “You look beautiful,” she says.

  My honey brown hair falls hopelessly past my shoulders in unruly waves that I’ve never been able to tame. My pale green eyes match my mother’s perfectly as my stare meets hers in our reflection.

  “I’m sorry honey,” she sighs. “Maybe next month we can get you a few new things, okay?”

  “No, Mama, it’s fine,” I respond firmly, with a reassuring smile. “I don’t need anything new.”

  “We should get going,” she suggests gently.

  A wave of guilt hits me as I follow her through the narrow hallway of our trailer and into the small kitchen. We’re lucky to have what we have and I shouldn’t be wishing for new clothes when what I have in my closet is just fine.

  The faded linoleum creaks beneath my feet as I reach up to one of the wood paneled cupboards and grab myself a strawberry Poptart from the box. My mom swipes her purse and apron from the counter top and heads for the front door. Following behind, I hoist my backpack up from the floor of the mudroom and sling it over my shoulder.

  It’s been four years since my dad died and we lost our farm. My pa
rents always worked hard and we lived comfortably, but we were never rich. When my dad got sick with cancer, everything we had was sold and used to pay for treatment. When he passed away, whatever we had left was used for funeral expenses and debt. After all of that, we had just enough to buy a mobile home in the local trailer park and now my mama waits tables at Lureen’s Truck Stop Diner. Sometimes I think my life sounds like an actual country song. Sometimes I feel so much older than seventeen.

  I pry open the passenger door of our rusted old Monte Carlo as it grumbles to life.

  “All set?”

  “Yup,” I say, forcing a smile.

  My mom backs the car up, away from our faded old trailer and pulls out onto the county road that will take us to the only school in town. I look in the side view mirror and watch the tacky neon sign fade behind us. Paradise Court. Yeah…right.

  *

  The town of Redemption, population 859, sits smack dab in the middle of nowhere. Within the limits of Miracle County, it’s simply a dusty pit stop on the highway. No one here even bothers to change that, either. The town’s slogan says it all…The road through Redemption, leads to Fortune. That’s all we are, a dot on a map that’ll guide you to the city of Fortune. The only thing that keeps folks living here is the paper mill, the commercial farmland and I suppose the fact that they don’t know any different and are in no hurry to try something new.

  We approach the school and park behind the bus that brings in the kids from the local farms. A bus that I used to ride.

  “Okay, you’ve got some money for lunch?”

  “Yes.”

  “And you’ve got your schedule?”

  “I’ll swing by the office and grab it,” I say.

  “I’m working a double today, but I left a casserole in the fridge so just heat it up when you’re ready.”

  I unbuckle my seatbelt and pick my backpack up from the floor near my feet. “Okay,” I reply, rummaging through my bag to make sure I have all my supplies.

  “Your daddy would be so proud of you, honey,” she states. “And I’m proud of you too.”

  “Thanks, Mama.” I lean across the seat and give her a quick kiss before I open the door and climb out of the car.

  The school is divided into two sections, the elementary side and the freshman to senior side. I walk along the concrete path and around the building, spotting my friend Emily as she waits for me near the main doors. Ugh, great. Josh is leaning against the wall beside her.

  “Prairie!” she shouts.

  “Hey!” I wave awkwardly as I approach them.

  “What? No hello for me?” Josh asks.

  “Hi Josh,” I mutter.

  “I was just telling Emily about the new truck my old man bought me this summer,” he brags. “Maybe you two want a ride home after school?”

  Emily looks up at him with her big blue eyes and smiles as though he just offered her his unconditional love.

  “That would be great,” she says.

  “I think I’ll pass. I’m kind of out of the way anyways.”

  Emily and Josh both live on the outskirts of town on neighbouring acreages. The side of town that I used to live on.

  “Whatever,” he says to me with a shrug before he turns his attention away from us.

  “Ugh, he is so hot,” Emily sighs.

  I look at her with her straight blonde hair and her slim figure and then over at Josh. His matching blond hair is cut short and styled meticulously. He’s wearing full cowboy attire right down to a pair of shiny leather boots, even though I’m certain he’s never ridden anything in his entire life. They’d make a cute couple but I’ll never understand what she sees in him. He’s always been a spoiled brat.

  “If you say so,” I tell her.

  “Oh shut up,” she laughs. “He’s hot, don’t deny it.”

  “I’ll meet you in homeroom,” I say, changing the subject. “I have to stop by the office and get my schedule.”

  “Didn’t you pick it up last week?”

  “No, I was helping out at the diner and I didn’t have time,” I explain. “It’s no biggie, I’ll just grab it now. See ya later.”

  “Okay. Later,” she mumbles, her eyes still focused on Josh.

  I shake my head and make my way around the crowd, nodding hellos as I go. We hardly ever get new students, so everyone that’s here now, I’ve pretty much grown up with. There’s a couple other kids my age from the trailer park but most of the kids are bussed in.

  Emily and I have been friends since pre-school. She’s the only one who didn’t get weird when my mom and I moved into town. I guess some of my old friends think I’m not good enough to be in their little clique anymore. Whatever. I’ve worked my ass off over the last two years and I’ll be graduating a full year early. I’ll be applying for as many scholarships as I can and then I’ll work even harder until I can give my mom and me a better life. It’s what my dad would want. Work hard Prairie, and you can do anything. That’s what he always used to tell me.

  I swing open the main door and head for the office, the scent of Lysol and floor polish filling my nose as I go. I walk around the corner and see that Mrs. Buck, our school secretary, is busy with someone so I take a seat in a plastic chair along the beige wall across from her desk. I set my bag down as my eyes wander over the office walls to kill time when suddenly they land on someone I haven’t seen before. He walks through the same set of doors that I just came through and takes the seat beside me. I’m not sure if he’s a student but if he is, he sure doesn’t look like it. His dark brown hair is thick and short and kind of messy and he has a bit of scruff along his jaw that most guys my age would kill for. He’s wearing a plain, fitted white T-shirt, faded jeans and black boots. I casually glance over and notice the flex of his arm as he reaches down and unzips his green backpack, pulling out a piece of paper. I guess he does go here.

  “I think she’s talking to you,” he says to me, his voice smooth and deep.

  “Uh, what?”

  “Miss Bennett! Come on girl, I’ve got things to do,” Mrs. Buck scolds.

  “Right! Sorry,” I say, my face warming.

  I self consciously step towards her desk, feeling his eyes on my back the entire time. I get my schedule and also set up a meeting with the guidance counselor so I can get some information on scholarship applications. When I turn around, my eyes flash to the set of chairs where he’s still sitting. I offer him a small smile and dip my head down as I head for the door.

  Who was that?

  *

  By sixth period I feel overwhelmed. I’m taking three science options this semester and two math courses, which are all requirements for the nursing program that I hope to get into after graduation. It’s going to be tough, but I keep telling myself it will all be worth it in the end. Luckily, I have a free period now but I’m going to stop by the library before I head home. I use the computer to look up some books on organic chemistry and write down the info on a scrap of paper. I leave my stuff and head for the non-fiction shelves. Turning a corner, I walk right into a hard chest and inhale the light scent of laundry detergent.

  “You okay?”

  I tilt my head back and look up at a pair of dark brown eyes, feeling myself blush as I take a step back. “Yeah. Sorry, I didn’t see you.”

  “It’s okay,” he shrugs.

  I continue to stand there like a moron, no doubt making a fool of myself. I was so wrapped up in my classes today that I’d actually forgotten all about him.

  “I should get these,” I say eventually, waving the scrap of paper up as if he’ll know what I’m talking about.

  He steps aside and lets me pass but stays where he is while I bend down and look for the first book on my list.

  “What’s your name?” he asks.

  “My name?”

  “Yeah,” he laughs lightly.

  Duh.

  “Prairie,” I say, standing. “What’s your name?”

  “Logan,” he replies.

  “N
ice to meet you.”

  He hesitates for a moment before he adds, “See ya around.” And turns back the way I came.

  I find the other book I’m looking for and replay my lame conversation skills in my mind over and over. It’s not that I’m necessarily shy but something about him made me nervous. He’s definitely someone that I would call hot and I smile to myself when I think of how Emily would definitely disagree. She likes guys that are clean cut and I wouldn’t use those words to describe Logan. Not even a little bit. I check out my books and grab my backpack and hoodie from the table I was sitting at before glancing at the clock and deciding that I should start heading home. The trailer park isn’t too far from the school but it will take me at least twenty minutes to walk home and I want to have enough time to study before and after supper. The thought alone exhausts me but I just keep reminding myself, it’ll all be worth it in the end.

  Chapter 2

  Logan

  I watch from my seat in the corner of the library, my eyes following the girl with the curly hair and the chemistry books. Prairie. She probably thinks I’m a creep but seeing her this morning in the office and then again just now, I couldn’t help myself. I had to know her name. I didn’t think anything pretty existed in Redemption, until now. It makes me sound like a pussy but when she slammed into my chest and looked up at me with those bright green eyes, I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

  I look over at the clock and figure I should head home soon. My mom will be home from work in a few hours and I wouldn’t mind trying to sleep for a bit before her and Brad start drinking and fighting. I slide my books into my backpack and head for the main doors. I turn down the side of the building, across the grass towards the trailer park. I throw my bag over one shoulder and walk through the parking lot, mostly full of staff vehicles but a couple student vehicles as well. I notice a shiny new Dodge and smirk to myself, thinking it must be nice to have shit like that.

  When I reach the dirt county road, I look ahead and see the girl from the library walking in the same direction. I think about shouting at her, but I don’t want to scare her so I keep quiet. After a few minutes, she glances back and notices me. I watch her take a couple more steps before she pauses and looks back again, this time standing still. She’s waiting for me.